Toby Saves His Mom!

I jump on MY mom all the time,
but Toby really knows what he's doing!

Photo by Adelma Gregory-Bunnell / Cecil Whig via AP. Thanks!

Toby, a brilliant 2-year-old golden retriever, witnessed his Mom choking on an apple. She tried to perform the Heimlich on herself but wasn't successful. After she began beating on her chest, Toby sensed an emergency at hand, and took matters into his own paws.

He stood up on his hind feet, put his front paws on her shoulders, pushed her to the ground, and began to jump up and down on her chest. The apple dislodged and Toby licked his Mom's face to keep her from passing out!

For the record, I would do anything to rescue MY Mom, and I would have reacted the exact same way... except I would have also scarfed down the apple bite.

No need in letting a tasty treat go to waste!

Happy Happy Happy...

Happy Valentine's Day!!!

Graphic by Angi Laframboise
who has an online gallery of really great work!
Of course, her golden retriever t-shirts, buttons, journals, coffee cups
and a ton of other neat things... are just awesome!
I just love 'em!
Click on the links and buy something!

Happy Valentine's Day, Mom!

You're not just my Mom...
You're my BFF!

Auntie D and yours truly have been sneaking around again!
She picked me up the other day and took me shopping!
Check out the swell card we picked out for Mom!
Girl-O-Girl was she surprsised!

My handwriting is improving... don't you think?

Merry Christmas to All...

And to All a Good Night!

As "legend" has it... this is pick-up night...
you know, the night that Santa comes back
and picks up toys from children who are not grateful...

So, let me begin by thanking everyone
who made my Christmas SPECIAL beyond my wildest dreams!

Thank you, Mom!

And thank you Aunties and God-Moms Kristi and Susan!
I'm truly sorry I've already killed the reindeer...
but at least he still rattles!

Thank you Auntie M and Shy-Knees!
Please know that Hippy lives well with me!
You MUST come for a playdate soon!

Thank you Auntie S, Uncle M and Sammy!
You know how I love couture...
and well, puppy baby has the most adorable squeaky!

And thank you Auntie D, Uncle B and cousin Lovey!
I adore the duck, mini effy and min-pin-gwin!
And while I'm not keen on Mom's visit to you on this specialist of days...
I also want to thank you for the mood she returns to me in,
and for the tasty foil wrapped foods she brings in tow!
It's a small price to pay for a solitary nap! :-)

All in all, it was a BLESSED Christmas Day!
Mom didn't get the Play Station 3 that I asked for...
but she told me, as we shmuggled tonight...

all she really wants is
continued good health and long days for us both!

Christmas Couture and My Gift from Sammy!

Christmas is full of surprises...
And so is Sammy!

Poised on sofa pillows, I am adorning Christmas couture from Sammy, and accessorized with reindeer antlers, strung with mock Christmas lights.

I love my festive new collar... but not as much as the soft, squeaking puppy baby that Sammy also gave me! If I seem a bit impatient here... it's because the baby lurks in the bedroom, calling me hither!

Merry Krinkle Christmas, Mom!

Reindeer Dog... Comet!

Mom has been scurrying around here, decorating my tree... and arriving home each day with exciting bags of goodies that I know are all for me! I'm allowed to root my nose through a few of them, but most are put away... far, far out of my reach.

Still... I decided to surprise her with another card!

My Mom loves and collects Krinkle ornaments, and it all started with Reindeer Dog.
You see, she and Auntie D have this tradition.
They spend one whole Saturday... away from me.
Ok, I'm not so keen on that part, but they go to some place called eeeevints...
and the great thing is that Mom comes back really happy...
loaded with bags and bags of neat things she hangs on my special tree.

I don't know what all they do on their expedition...
but this year Mom came home smelling like Cheddar! (more on that later!).

What Mom doesn't know... is that Auntie D and I have OUR traditions too...
We sneak off and buy really great things for Mom... like this card!

Merry Christmas, Mom!

Is this what you meant when you said I could have my own tree?

This is actually the first Christmas card I sent my Mom this year!
She loved it! And it was a terrific surprise!

The selection was quite easy as it both appropriately expresses my enthusiasm for the season and is reminiscent of the cards Mom sent out in celebration of my first Christmas!

And with a secretive trip down to the post office in Friendswood, I mailed this one off!
Thanks for the ride, Auntie D!

Dear Santa

Dear Santa,

I've been a very good girl this year.
And please remember that you can't believe everything the mailman says...
nor take the lawn guy's word as gospel!
I believe it would behoove you to listen more carefully
to my more impartial references...
like Mom!

Christmas is a time of holy celebration and gratitude and, well... for asking for things you want.

And in the spirit of self reflection, I am providing you with a short list of my desires. If you can't deliver everything, please begin at the top of the list!

1. More one-on-one love, cuddle, play, story, laugh, talk, dance time with Mom.
2. More time with everyone I love... family and friends.
3. More songs about me, sung to me... by Mom.
4. More time in my yard!
5. More adventurous walks through the park and neighborhood.
6. Another adventurous vacation.
7. Soft and cute toys that squeak, rattle, talk and play hide-n-seek under the covers!
8. Cute collars, coats and outfits that I can don with pride.
9. Tasty treats I can gulp down... and long-lasting ones that I can hide under the sofa pillows.
10. And Santa, in the spirit of the season,
    please bring a PlayStation 3 for Mom.

Wet kisses, huge tail wags... and lots of love!

CoMeT

Christmas Tree, Oh Christmas Tree

How pretty I look in front of ye!

Don't let my glum look fool you.
I love posing in my new collar with holiday candy accents!
Mom bought us new hers and mine antlers... but I prefer hers to mine!

Mother's Day, About the Bike

Happy Mother's Day, Mom... sorta.

For the record... I didn't give her the bike.
I gave her the time to ride it.

And for the record, I'm not crazy about it.
I resign myself to it for now, but I think I can take it.
Eventually, she will leave for work.
If I can't chase it away, perhaps
I can clean my teeth with the tires.

Perhaps.

Working The Room at the Vet's Office: Bob Hope Would Be Proud!

I might have mentioned here before... I love to go. And today we went to the vet's office for my 6 month checkup and shots.

We left home during a break in this morning's storm. To show my appreciation to Mom, from the constraints of my backseat belt, I alternately rested my head on her shoulder and gently licked her cheek. Of course, I had to take the occasional break to shnooof the air conditioning!

We arrived at the vet's office to find a crowded waiting room. There were small dogs; there were large dogs. There were sick dogs; there were scared dogs. And they were all there to be entertained. So, for 53 minutes, much to Mom's dismay, entertain I did! I know my commands, and sit I shall... but there's not a command in the world to keep me from sweeping the floor with my tail and smiling, smiling, smiling! And if the occasional "woo woo woo" parts my lips, am I to blame?

I believe I brought a little sunshine into Betty's day, and she needed that since she was suffering from a mild case of sloopy poopy.

And the little PomPom, who had a fear of large dogs since one attacked her... I think my gentle kisses helped her overcome at least some of her fears. After all, she was willingly coming out of her little 'purse' to watch me!

And the two little chewawas couldn't keep their eyes off me!

Of course, there was the one brief intermission... when the Mom of the pit bull asked us to all move to one side of the room, because he was "cantankerous"... HER words, not MINE. MINE would be... scarey as hell! To everyone's relief, he passed right through the waiting room to a maximum security kennel.

My checkup was short, but pleasant. Dr. B was out of town, so I saw Dr. C. I like Dr. B a little better, only because she "gets" me and Mom. Dr. C is nice though, even though he seems a little suspicious of my good nature! So, I got a shot and a squirt up the nose. The good thing is that Dr. C won't get kennel cough either. No lumps, no bumps, good heart, clear lungs, a pokey in the rear and my nails clipped! I'm good for another 6 months!

The trip home was as the trip there. And the water bowl was a welcome sight at home!

The adventure, for whatever reason, seemed a little tiring for Mom. She went to lunch with Sammy's Mom and Dad (Sammy went to the vet this morning, too!). They must have left us home so they could commisserate or some such thing. And when she got home, we took a good long nap.

Ok, I'll admit it... I'm a little tired, too.

But the troops had to be entertained. It was the least I could do, given the opportunity and the circumstances. So long as there is need, the CSO (Comet Service Organization) show must go on!

But for now... I must rest and reflect on the day.

Ell Eee Tee Ess GO!

Perhaps you can tell from today's discussion topic... I've got GOING on my mind.

Me and Sammy and our moms went on a walk last night. And I think we should go on a walk tonight. I mean, we should, right?

I have tried all of the tricks. I have barked. I have bumped the leash hanging on the hook, repeatedly. I have stared Mom down. And I have sighed deeply.

And nothing. Absolutely NOTHING.

Mom seems real tired and has been on the phone non-stop... something about a meeting, question on a jobsite and my uncle in the hospital (he's ok, thank God!). She even talked to some man that must've done her wrong some time. That may have been the final straw.

I'm afraid the only place we're going tonight is... bed.

Sigh.

goldens rule no. 8

The more I go, the more I want... yea, the more I expect to go.

A Golden Girl's Thoughts On Going

I love going:

1. on vacations
2. camping
3. to the beach
4. to friends' houses
5. on walks
6. on playdates
7. to Petco / PetsMart
8. outside
9. to bed

There are exceptions. I don't like going:

1. On errands. I don't get it. You go and go and go and end up right back where you started. Makes no sense.
2. And being dropped off. Name the reason. It ain't good.

Pawsing With Skooochy

Skooochy

Sammy gave him to me for my birthday.

He's named that because that's the sound he makes.
He's an excellent wrestling partner, and I like to rest with him, too.
He fits into the window sill real good, and I like to rest my head on him.

(Check out my muddy paws. Mom almost had a heart attack when she caught me in this chair!)

Curling Up With Bob

My Birthday Present from ShineyBo!

Skweek Skweek Skweek Skweek!
Excellent vocal companion to the American Idol Contestants.
Text message VOTE to 530-BOB!

Love that Bob!

(Not so crazy about Mom's housekeeping! She's been making boxes again!)

My Birthday Gifts

The Lineup:

Skooochy, Big Frawgy, Chocklick Covered Do-nut (front), Bob, Ducky (aka Kenny), Flamingo in a Bikini, Funny Blue Bird, Jonah 5, Jonah 6, Jonah 7, Lil Frawgy

(You're probably wondering. Yes, Mom took this picture while I was outside).

So Check It Out, Dawg...!

Last night, I slept with the WackWack, the Easter Bunny, Jonah (of course), Bob, Frawgy and Skooochy! Oh yeah, and Mom!

Then this morning when Mom was in the shower, I reached in the bag that Shiney gave me and retrieved my little ducky! I don't know what I'm gonna call him yet, but for some reason, I'm thinking... Kenny!

Happy Birthday, Dear Comet!

Happy Birthday to Me!

I have, indeed, had a happy birthday.

I got to open presents from Auntie M and ShineyBo last night. They gave me a squeaky hedgehog, that I call Bob. And I got a ducky and a chocklick covered do-nut! Let the festivities begin!

Then early this morning, as I 'smuggled' my little head next to Mom's, she quietly hummed the birthday song to me, while I gently kept time with the tip of my tail.

Mom had to go to work at the milkbone factory (as usual), but she came home a little early to get the party started.

We kicked off the celebration with a little present opening. Mom had a big bag of toys for me, and I was ecstatic over each one. As is Mom's way, she let me pick one to play with immediately (I picked Frawgy) and she put the rest back in the bag, out of my reach. She did that she said because she "didn't want them to get spoiled". I'm sure it was 'them' she said... and certainly not ME!

So we were just kicking it with Frawgy, and I was secretly waiting on Mom to make me my traditional birthday hamburger... when the phone rang. It was Sam's mom. She said we should look out our front door. I did! And there was another bag of presents! My Sammy... he gave me a festive bandanna (with "LOVE" on it!), a collapsible water bowl for our walks, and a zebra that I call Skooochy!

I am ONE HAPPY GIRL! And I'm gonna round out my evening with a lot of loving, a lot of play, and a good ole hamburger!

What April 19th Means To Me

Wellington P Bonaparte

Wellington was my brother. He and I were born on the same day of different years. He was born in 1984, and I was born in 1999. I owe him the great fortune of the life I live, and I still pause wistfully at the mention of his name.

You see, Mom and Wellington were satisfied with their lives together. But when Aunt Susan, who was present at my birth, called to Mom that she had to have me... well, from what I hear, though reluctant, Mom considered the events some sort of divine calling.

I don't know if it was divine or not. What I do know is that Wellington, while not enthusiastic about a new protege/sister, was patient, tolerant and (he would kill me for saying this) very 'mothering'.

He was patient. He was kind. He was my protector. It was funny. He would let me get by with any indescretion, as long as Mom wasn't a witness. Once he saw her, he would growl to scold me.

He tried his best to teach me. I swear, he knew everything. He knew what to do and when. He tried to show me how to be, but I was a wee bit resistant, and a wee bit jealous.

What I know now is that he was trying to show my how to take care of Mom. You see, Wellington was the ONE constant in Mom's life. He saw her through all of her losses. He worried about her, and he stood strong for her. And I believe in the end, he entrusted her to me.

Don't ask me how I know... but Mom has a lot of undeveloped film, including many photos of Wellington and me together. I hope she'll have it developed so I can post them here...

Some Bunny Loves Me!

Easter morning is here!

Check out my Easter Basket!

The Easter Bunny left me toys... a bunny, a pink rooster, a purple bone, and a goose in a bikini! The rest of the basket is filled with Dingo treats!

I love that Easter Bunny! Happy Easter to all!

LIFE'S GOLDEN! HAPPY EASTER!

HAPPY EASTER!
***Mom found this cool new website!
It'S perfect for all of your shopping needs!
And by the by, it seems that someone you love
is celebrating a birthday soon!

My Much Anticipated Bath

Yes. It's a 'done deal'.
I spent the afternoon in the bathtub,
and in the bathroom with the blow dryer.

Now I smell heavenly,
and Mom smells like a wet dog

Golden Retrievers... Clumsy?

According to Planet Dog: a doglopedia, Golden Retrievers rank #8 in the list of the 10 Clumsiest Dogs!

I rather differ with that characterization! I prefer to think that I have an unbridled joy for life, and an unhibited, nonchalant, and playful disposition!

Here are the other maligned families:

1. Chocolate Labrador
2. Staffordshire Bull Terrier
3. Rottweiler
4. Springer Spaniel
5. German Shepherd crossbreed
6. Cocker Spaniel
7. German Shepherd
8. Golden Retriever
9. Border Collie
10. Yorkshire Terrier

A Golden Retriever Joke

A woman and her golden retriever walk into a pub and sidle up to the bar. The woman announces to the bartender that the golden can talk. The bartender says, "Ma'am, if you're dog can talk, I'll buy you both a beer!"

The woman says, "It's a deal!", turns to the golden retriver and asks, "What's the structure over our heads called?". The golden looks up, thinks a moment and says, "Roof".

The bartender is unimpressed. So, the woman turns again to the dog and asks, "Who's the greatest baseball player of all time?". The golden thinks a moment and replies, "Ruth".

With that answer, the bartender abruptly escorts both the woman and her dog to the curb, at which time the golden looks up at the bartender and says...

"DiMaggio?".

Mom Left Me Home Today...

when she went out to run errands. I was upset at first and I pouted a little.

But I danced my happy dance when she got home!

She brought home two boxes of Buddy Biscuits... Molasses Madness!

I love Mom.

THIS Golden Retriever's Thoughts on Grooming

Mom made casual mention that my good friend, Shy-knee, has an appointment for a day of beauty tomorrow, at her local salon. While she might have mentioned it casually, I know the point Mom was trying to make. And that made me paws to think about grooming.

While I am quite the ballerina and girly girl, and I take pride in my natural beauty and golden locks, I have very definite opinions about grooming rituals that are good and right... and those that are just plain overkill, even for a princess like me.

1. Full baths are an unnecessary evil. I mean, are these just an attempt to punish and humiliate me? What did I do so wrong??? Answer me that, and I'll take a bath willingly. Full baths can easily be avoided by graceful dips in lakewater, joyful leaps in the ocean surf, and even by dawdling outside in the spring rains! Besides, too many baths remove the natural oils that are necessary for a good coat. And I don't have to tell you how I feel about a good coat!
2. Blow drying should be a criminal offense. I'm all about the right to bear arms, but that gun oughta be outlawed. I'm willing to be corralled in a tight space in close proximity to Mom, so long as she's not armed with a brush in one hand and a blow dryer in the other!
3. A half bath (or as Mom calls it... a cheater's bath) ain't half bad. That's when she uses those fresh smelling paper things and wipes me down. The best things I can say about a half bath: it's over quick, I don't smell half bad when it's over, and it IS attention!
4. A spit bath is ideal. Lord knows that I love a spit bath. That's when Mom takes a wet washcloth and cleans around my mouth, ears, armpits and paws. I get these every night in the summer months, it's totally quick and painless, and a great way to cool down!
5. The hairbrush is alluring. Its sight makes my knees weaken, quite literally. Here are the rules: Head, ok. Ears, ok. Neck and back, great. Chest, great. Sides, good. Legs, you're pushing it. Backs of the legs and tail, OFF LIMITS! Remember, when you people go to the salon, you ALL sit and protect your backside. Where does it say that feathering must be without natural curl? Show me a book about the breed standard, and I'll bite your nose!
6. De-tangling is quick and relatively painless. I rarely get mats (maybe one or two in my life), but Mom has this comb that with one or two quick strokes... out comes a clump of hair. It's a small price to pay for protecting your behind while being brushed.
7. Having my teeth brushed isn't too bad, because the toothpaste... well, it tastes just like chicken (snicker)! And after all, I only have mine brushed once a week; Mom's teeth must be dirtier... she brushes them several times a day. Now THAT's overkill.
8. Having my teeth cleaned is another thing all together. I mean, is this grooming? Or SURGERY? First, I don't like Mom dropping me off ANYwhere. Second, they knock me out and scrape my teeth? I love that Mom picks me up and spends the rest of the day with me, but that's little consolation for the trauma.
9. Toe nail clipping is a good thing. I mean, I don't tread on hard surfaces so much, so my delicate nails sometimes need clipping (for my own comfort and for the sake of our 50 year old waxed hardwood floors). I don't know why Mom has such anxiety around the process... she will sometimes clip the tips, but most often takes me somewhere to have them clipped.
10. Nothing says loving like lotion on the paws. Yeah, I don't think it's all that necessary, but there is just something about your Mom rubbing lotion on your paws that makes you feel, not just pampered, but ADORED.
11. Eye boogies must be cleared immediately, if not sooner! Several times a day is a good schedule, depending on windy conditions, airborne allergens and the state of the dusty perimeter trail.

Of course, I will consult with my pal Shy-knees, to see how she feels about her "day of beauty". She might have a different take. After all... HER mom takes HER to a spa!!!!

Midnight Calling

I had a midnight calling last night. It wasn't pleasant.

I woke Mom up at midnight last night, with a pitiful whimper of pain. She got up immediately, disarmed the alarm and followed me outside.

I made a mad dash into the yard. It was a horrible case of sloopy poopy. Mom sat patiently and watched me. I returned to her and then to the door as soon as I thought it was over.

We went in and went back to bed. I laid very close to Mom. I heard her saying a prayer over me, and I rolled my head over to put my nose on her cheek. I heaved a loud sigh and went back to sleep, but I'm not so sure she did. I felt her checking on me the rest of the night... after all, she's a Mom.

I woke up with sunshine in my soul, Mom not so much so. She didn't feed me very much, and then she sat outside while I meandered and sniffed and did my daily routine. I didn't give her any reason to worry further, but something tells me she did... ALL DAY at work.

Sammy Takes The Lead By Five Noses

(and five tails!)

Sammy..........10

Comet..........5

Squirrels..........-15

Discounting death and annihilation, as I rather believe that Sammy is avenging the destruction, trespass and illegal inhabitancy of my abode/attic...

Isn't he an absolute hunk???!

A Golden Retriever's Thoughts: The Telephone

Daylight

Talk all you want, but let's go outside. You can sit on the porch and chat. I'll bark like a junkyard dog in sight of an intruder, but you go ahead and carry on your conversation!

Dark

Talk should be limited to brief conversations relating to the following subjects:

1. Sometimes there are emergencies, and I fully understand. I trust you in that regard and will remain as quiet as a mouse.
2. Scheduling a doggy friendly vacation.
3. Scheduling a playdate or walk in the park.
4. Scheduling my people to come stay with us.
5. Checking the stock of my favorite treats at the doggy grocery store.
6. Ordering cool toys by phone.
7. FOOD DELIVERIES! (I don't care... pizza, wings, Chinese... it's ALL good by me!).

All other occasions:

1. A ringing phone need not be answered. After all, you're on MY time now.
2. Should you take or make a call, my first defense is a demand to go outside, stir up my pals, stalk a frog, eat some poop, chase a rat, spot a possum, tree a cat... or if all else fails, hide and ignore Mom in a dark corner.
3. Otherwise, there's no better place for me than your lap.
4. It only takes one hand to hold a phone. Your other hand isn't doing anything, so rub my tummy while I wallow and snort loudly.
5. If that other hand remains idle...well, ignore me and I'll BARK.
6. Where IS my obnoxious talking (never-say-die) gorilla???! Or what about my gangster toys... "How ya doin, How ya doin, How ya doin"... and the notorious, "You talkin to me?, You talkin to me?, You talking to me?"???! In a pinch, my "I love you. I love you. I love you." heart will suffice.
7. Move the blinds around with your nose. For some reason, that's a sound that annoys people. (heehee).
8. Bark out the front window, with all of the emotion (joy, anger... whatever) in my heart, BARK!
9. If that fails, BARK out the back!
10. If that fails, bark in Mom's ear!
11. Circle the house restlessly, then disappear.
12. And when all else fails, plop down in desparation... sigh loudly and utilize the notorious GUILT TACTIC. It IS, after all, the tool that ALWAYS works.

A Golden Retriever's Thoughts: Sofa Pillows

As a puppy:

1. Great teething material.
2. Excellent substitution in warmer climates for snow.
3. Fun to attack and foil their diabolical plot.
4. Excellent hiding place for chewies.
5. If you have it, I want it.
6. If your head is on it, so must my whole body.

As an adult:

1. I don't get Mom's aesthetic arrangement.
2. Re-shaping square pillows is my specialty.
3. In a big chair, perfect under me.
4. If the chair is too small, the pillow goes on the floor.
5. On a sofa, a couple is all I need.
6. Best on the floor, in all instances, once the nap is over.
7. Those that impede the relaxation process are best on the floor.
8. Excellent hiding place for chewies.
9. If our head is on it, so must my whole body.

Golden Retriever Recipe for a Perfect Day

(16 things Mom could learn from me!)

Each day should consist of:

1. Leisurely waking.
2. A good stretch upon rising.
3. Smooching and lovey dovey time, a-plenty.
4. Two good, filling and timely meals (and maybe a snack or two in between).
5. Lots of cool fresh water.
6. Persnickety attention to the calls of nature. (hey... I can hold it forever, but when I go, I want to go in just the right place).
7. Lots of talking and a little singing.
8. Answering to the joy in your heart, however it may lead you.
9. Work a little and play a LOT.
10. A couple of nice peaceful naps, preferably in a dark room or even in a sunny window sill.
11. Curiosity and challenge, obsessing over neither, and dropping both for a run at the food bowl or the chance to smooch.
12. Wallowing and snorting. In fact, nothing's better than a good wet sneeze!
13. A little time (a very little time) spent on grooming.
14. A little running, a little television, a little window watching and a little barking.
15. A bone-deep sigh upon retiring for the night.
16. Peaceful slumber lying as close as possible to the one you love the most.

Blonde Joke

A Chow Chow friend of mine told me a funny joke
(my apologies in advance to all of Mom's cute blonde friends):

What do you call an intelligent blonde?

A Golden Retriever.

Update: Isaac Newton Studies

A note to those who check in regularly:
Isaac Newton Studies are still being conducted.
Stay tuned for further updates!

Activity v. Rest

Every Action has an Equal and Opposite Reaction:

Activity v. Rest

Activity.
Ahem. I am a golden retriever. I am active. It's a fact to which there is no dispute. I believe my extreme level of activity is well documented in these web records. Visitors might sometimes think that I'm HYPERactive, due to my no-holds-barred enthusiasm and welcome-wagon sense of duty, but in reality, I'm just a very busy girl.

Rest.
What can I say? I sleep EVERY BIT AS HARD as I work and play.

If Isaac Newton Had Studied A Golden Retriever, Introduction

Sir Isaac Newton concluded: Every Action has an Equal and Opposite Reaction.

It's been a rather dreary day today, and I've spent my Sunday divided in restless pursuit of restless squirrels balanced with peaceful contemplation of the laws of nature.

We watch quite a bit of news in this house and I've grown accustomed to ratings weeks, expose's and the fact that interest in sigh-ins is important to my generation.

So, this week I'll give you my interpretation of Sir Isaac Newton's theory, as it applies to the typical golden retriever. It's an interesting study, and I hope you will stay tuned.

Golden Retrievers and Their Celebrity Folks

This weekend is Oscar weekend, so I thought I'd sniff out my fellow goldens that have celebrity parents, and this is a little of what I dug up:

Star: Pamela Anderson

Cheeseburger (mmmmm): Jimmy Buffett

Sol: Neil Diamond

Fawn Hall (heehee): Dennis Quaid

Boomer (surprised Mom didn't name ME this!): Henry Stern (NYC Parks Commissioner)

Ajax (my competitor... get it???): Livingston Taylor (singer, songwriter and also multi-instrumental musician)

Pluto: John Larroquette

Molson (slurrrrrrp): Kristine Lily (1996 Olympic Gold Medallist in Soccer)

Twenty Fun Things To Do When Mom Is Home Sick

1. Bring her toys.
2. Lay on the clicker.
3. Sigh loudly.
4. At her slightest movement, jump up suddenly and run to the back door.
5. Come back and stare at her from her side of the bed.
6. When she lets you out, pray on her weakness and refuse to come back in.
7. Run in circles, restlessly through the house.
8. Move the blinds back and forth in the windows.
9. Lie quietly in the bed beside her, then abruptly bark... at the meter reader, a squirrel, a bird, a leaf... or nothing at all.
10. Throw a party when she drags herelf into the kitchen to prepare something to eat.
11. Follow her into the bathroom, wagging your tail and smiling.
12. Better yet, take her place in bed when she goes to the bathroom.
13. Jump off the bed and insist that she lets you back up on her side.
14. Lick the end of the thermometer.
15. Growl that growl you growl when you see her hands idle and you want to be rubbed.
16. Lay your head on her head.
17. Hog the bed.
18. Stand up on the bed between her and the ringing phone on the other side of the bed.
19. Disappear. Suspiciously disappear.
20. When her office calls, bark happily as if you are having the best "snow" day ever!

A Golden Retriever's Weather Commentary: SUNSHINE

Today's forecast: BLUE SKIES AND SUNSHINE

GOOD: I get to stay outside most of the day.

GOOD: I get to see Sammy.

GOOD: Lots of interesting sounds outside... music, laughter and garden tools.

GOOD: I get to chase squirrels across the yard.

GOOD: I get to take a nap inside, with my head in a sunny windowsill.

GOOD: Someone's cooking something good!!!

IT'S ALL GOOD!

A Golden Retriever's Weather Commentary: RAIN

Today's forecast: RAIN

GOOD: Getting wet is fun.
BAD: Mom constantly badgering... "PORCH. PORCH. PORCH." is not so fun.

GOOD: Getting dried off is fun.
BAD: Having feet wiped is not so fun.

GOOD: Flushing squirrels out of my window sills is fun.
BAD: There are squirrels in my window sills!

GOOD: Mom doesn't leave to do her normal errands.
BAD: She restricts my outdoor activity.

GOOD: Taking a nap on a gloomy day is relaxing.
BAD: I'd rather be outside!

Who's in the doghouse?!

Mom left thirty minute early for work this morning.

Mom was an hour and a half late coming home from work.

Any other questions?

Do Golden Retrievers Smile?

I was reading somewhere on the doggynet, about a debate amongst humans... "Do golden retrievers smile?"...

What do YOU think?

Wise Words from President Truman

"If you want a friend in Washington, get a dog." —President Harry S Truman

Seeing as how it's President's Day, and I didn't get to greet the mailman today (snicker), I had a little extra time to do some research.

Here's a list of animals who had Presidents:

George Washington: Polly the parrot; 36 hounds; horses
John Adams: horses
Thomas Jefferson: a mockingbird; two bear cubs, a gift from Lewis and Clark
James Madison: Macaw the parrot; sheep
James Monroe: a spaniel
John Quincy Adams: an alligator; silkworms
Andrew Jackson: horses named Truxton, Sam Patches, Emily, Lady Nashville, and Bolivia; Pol the parrot; ponies
Martin Van Buren: two tiger cubs
William Henry Harrison: a goat; a cow
John Tyler: Le Beau, a greyhound; a horse named The General
James Knox Polk: a horse
Zachary Taylor: Old Whitey the horse
James Buchanan: Lara, a Newfoundland; an eagle; an elephant
Abraham Lincoln: Jack the turkey; goats named Nanny and Nanko; ponies; cats; dogs; pigs; a white rabbit
Andrew Johnson: white mice (editor's note... ewwwwww!)
Ulysses S. Grant: Faithful, a Newfoundland; horses named Jeff Davis, Julia, Jennie, Mary, Butcher Boy, Cincinnatus, Egypt, and St. Louis; ponies named Reb and Billy Button; pigs; dogs; a parrot; roosters
Rutherford B. Hayes: Siam, a Siamese cat; Grim, a greyhound; Duke, an English mastiff; Hector, a Newfoundland; Dot, a terrier; canaries; cows; horses; goats; other dogs
James Garfield: Kit the horse; Veto (editor's note... snicker) the dog; fish
Grover Cleveland: a poodle; canaries and mockingbirds
Benjamin Harrison: Dash the dog; Whiskers the goat; dogs; an opossum
William McKinley: a parrot; an Angora cat and her kittens
Theodore Roosevelt: Sailor Boy, a Chesapeake Bay retriever (editor's note... close in my ancestry!); Manchu, a Pekingese; Skip, a mutt; terriers named Jack and Pete; cats named Tom Quartz and Slippers; Josiah the badger; Algonquin the pony; Eli the macaw; Jonathan the piebald rat (editor's note... did Sailor Boy know???) Emily Spinach, a garter snake; twelve horses; five bears; five guinea pigs; other snakes; two kangaroo rats; lizards; roosters; an owl; a flying squirrel; a raccoon; a coyote; a lion; a hyena; a zebra
William Taft: Pauline Wayne the cow
Woodrow Wilson: Old Ike the ram; sheep; chickens; cats
Warren Harding: Laddie Boy, an Airedale; Old Boy, a bulldog; canaries
Calvin Coolidge: Peter Pan, a terrier; Paul Pry (née Laddie Buck), an Airedale; Calamity Jane, a sheepdog; Boston Beans, a bulldog; King Cole, a shepherd; Palo Alto, a birder; collies named Rob Roy (née Oshkosh), Prudence Prim, Ruby Rough, and Bessie; chows named Blackberry and Tiny Tim; canaries named Nip, Tuck, and Snowflake; cats named Bounder, Tiger, and Blacky; raccoons named Rebecca and Horace; Ebeneezer, a donkey (Mom would love Ebeneezer); Smokey, a bobcat; Old Bill, a thrush; Enoch, a goose; a mockingbird; a bear; an antelope; a wallaby; a pygmy hippo; some lion cubs
Herbert Hoover: Glen, a collie; Yukon, a malamute; Patrick, an Irish wolfhound; Eaglehurst Gillette, a setter; Weejie, an elkhound; fox terriers named Big Ben and Sonnie; shepherds named King Tut and Pat; an opossum
Franklin Delano Roosevelt: Fala, a Scottish terrier; Meggie, a Scottish terrier; Major, a German shepherd; Winks, a Llewellyn setter; Tiny, an English sheepdog; President, a Great Dane; Blaze, a mastiff
Harry S Truman: Feller “the unwanted dog” (adopted by Truman's personal physician) (editor's note... evidently he didn't want a friend in Washington!); Mike, an Irish setter (belonged to Margaret Truman)
Dwight D. Eisenhower: Heidi, a Weimaraner
John F. Kennedy: Tom Kitten the cat; Robin the canary; Zsa Zsa the rabbit; Sardar the horse; ponies named Macaroni, Tex, and Leprechaun; parakeets named Bluebell and Marybelle; hamsters named Debbie and Billie; Charlie, a Welsh terrier, plus dogs named Pushinka, Shannon, Wolf, and Clipper, plus Pushinka and Charlie's pups: Blackie, Butterfly, Streaker, and White Tips
Lyndon Johnson: Him and Her, beagles; Freckles, a beagle (Him's pup); Blanco, a collie; Edgar, a mutt (née J. Edgar); Yuki, a mutt; hamsters and lovebirds
Richard Nixon: Checkers, a cocker spaniel; Vicky, a poodle; Pasha, a terrier; King Timahoe, an Irish setter; fish
Gerald Ford: Liberty, a Golden retriever (editor's note... smart man, President Ford!); Chan, a Siamese Cat
Jimmy Carter: Grits the dog; Misty Malarky Ying Yang, a Siamese cat
Ronald Reagan; Rex, a King Charles spaniel; Lucky, a Bouvier des Flandres sheepdog
George H. W. Bush: Millie, a Springer spaniel; Ranger, one of Millie's pups
Bill Clinton: Socks the cat; Buddy, a chocolate Labrador retriever
George W. Bush: Spot, a Springer spaniel, born in the White House in 1989 to George H. W. Bush's Millie (died Feb. 21, 2004); Barney, a Scottish terrier; India (“Willie”) the cat. The Bushes' orange-striped polydactyl cat Ernie was judged too wild for White House life and now lives with a family in California. In 2004, the President gave his wife Laura a Scottish terrier puppy named Miss Beazley for the First Lady's birthday.

Punxsutawney Phil was right! Winter is back!

Well, according to Ole Phil, we're in for another month of winter. At first I didn't believe him, since my yard is full of blooming azaleas, magnolias and lillies. But after this weekend, I think the ole boy knows what he's talking about!

According to legend, Groundhog Day is based on an old Scottish couplet: "If Candlemas Day is bright and clear, there'll be two winters in the year." So it goes that every February 2, people gather at Gobbler's Knob, a wooded (as opposed to grassy, I suppose) knoll just outside of Punxsutawney, Pennsylvania. And according to all who've witnessed, Phil ain't ever been wrong.

According to what I've read, Phil started making predictions in 1887, making him ONE OLD GROUNDHOG!

Green Retriever Puppy

Well, ain't that somethin'...
This little golden was born green!

Wasabi, (chuckle), the lil green pup,
was born to a Golden mom in Alhambro, California, last November.

To those that tend to worry...
Wasabi is completely healthy and doing just fine!

To those that tend to doubt...
the puppy really WAS born green!
And vets say that the coloration of the placenta, which is green,
rubbed off onto the pup's fur during birth.

If you're still curious... or skeptical... check out more photos here!

WOO WOO WOO... My Valentine from Sammy!

Sammy, MY BOYFRIEND...

I would never have thought him to be a shy boy,

but he had THIS VALENTINE GIFT delivered to me!

To Comet, From Sammy. Inscribed on a red heart.

Does this mean what I think it means?

My Sammy!

He knows the path to my heart runs straight through my tummy! He gave me YUMMIES!!!

I love cookies almost as much as...

I LOVE MY SAMMY!!!

MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM.........

There's more to this story. Sammy also got a bath and a shave today! I've always been taken by his boyish good looks, but he's cutting quite a dapper figure this Valentine's Day!

I may woo woo woo him, and then play hard to get... but he knows how I feel!

SAMMY IS MY SPECIAL VALENTINE!

More Valentine's Love for Mom!

What can I say? I'm sneaky and I'm a real treasure in Mom's life (and so are my friends and family!)! I really get around. I sent this card from 150 miles north of here! THIS girl gets around!

Funny story about why I paw-wrote "purple" on the tail!

When my Mom came to see the stork for the first time, there were a bunch of us. She fell in love with me, but I was growing by leaps and bounds (literally) in those days. She spent a couple of hours with me, and was convinced that she and I were destined to play (out) our days together! I needed a little more time with my birth mother (which is a story for another day), so Mom went to the beach. Before leaving, she wanted to make sure I didn't change too much for her to recognize when she got back. So... she and Aunt Susan painted the tip of my tail with a permanent purple marker!

What Mom didn't count on was... I would never forget her! When she came walking up, all tanned and relaxed... I came a'running, purple tail and all! I wasn't going to let her leave without ME!

I love that ole gal!

For Mom on Valentine's Day

My Heart Belongs to YOU, Mom! This is the card I sent from 45 miles south of here. (She can't figure out how I get around, but I have my ways... and REALLY good friends!).

You gotta get "THE SCOOP"!

I love my new POOPER SCOOPER! It's called "THE SCOOP"!

(Who, in the world, do you suppose would steal my old one???)

From what I can tell, this model is highly effective in my yard with thick St Augustine grass... and also helpful to pick up those pesky pecan hulls that hurt my paws!

My POOPER SCOOPER OPERATOR is pretty swell, too!

goldens postulate no. 3

Windy days = Big Eye Boogies

Hey! I LOVE GRAHAM CRACKERS, TOO!

Comet the reindeer

Read the wonderful story of Comet, born April 26, 2002.

Comet is one of Reindeer Games' first two reindeer!
She and Cupid were two weeks when they got them.
And Comet was bottle fed until September 16, 2002
(hmmmm... September 16 is my mother's birthday!
Wow... another strange coincidence!).

More facts:

Comet the reindeer has been in many parades.
Her first baby Rudolph was born May 4, 2004.
Comet loves graham crackers.

Reindeer Names

The Origins of The Reindeer Names

Why were the reindeer called their names?
Here's a short insight:

Dasher: runner up in 1972 Reindeer Olympics
Dancer: ex dancer from the Ministry of Sound
Prancer: reject from a ballet academy
Vixen: foxy kinda reindeer dudette
Comet: a trailblazer in the caribou world
Cupid: match-making beast with romantic tendencies
Donner & Blitzen: victims struck by lightning during a day trip to Berlin
Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer: The only reindeer allergic to snow

goldens postulate no. 2

Happiness is a king size bed.

Ozarks MisAdventure: Day Seven, Deer X and Our Return Home

This morning started differently. Mom awoke in a burst. We went for a quick walk. And while I ate my breakfast, she began gathering everything up. Auntie N cleaned and Mom took everything from the cabin and squeezed it compactly into the CRV.

What does this mean for me, I wondered. By that, I don't mean WHETHER I'm going... but WHERE I'm going.

Once in the car, I had a hard time settling down. I was thinking... the beach? Or Home Sweet Home. I would be satisfied with either, but the excitement was too great to contain.

We were going down a steep incline. Mom was commenting to the driver of the truck behind us, to please back off of our bumper. Remember, Auntie N was in the car. I'm pretty sure if it had just been the two of us, her language might have been a little more... explicit.

Then it happened.

Out of the woods on Mom's side of the car... a doe. I could clearly see that "OH NO" look in her eyes as she tried to change her trajectory. Mom was trying to slow down enough that the truck didn't hit us, but that the deer could pass in front of us.

It was not to be.

The doe hit the front fender and bounced back into the ditch on that same side of the road. She slid almost all the way to the bottom of the incline, hopped up and ran back into the woods.

The truck swerved around us in the oncoming lane and almost hit her, but luckily... didn't.

Mom pulled over and had a... meltdown. Remember, Auntie N was in the car. She might have had something different, otherwise.

It was a lot quieter on the way home. Mom stopped at a body shop to make sure we were ok to drive on home. We dropped Auntie N off in Nac and continued on to H-Town.

I slept most of the way. Vacations have a way of taking it out of you.

When we got home, I was relieved. I, leisurely, conducted a border check. The perimeter was secure, my yard and toys were exactly like I left them, and my king size bed is calling my name. Life is good, yet again... at home.

Ozarks Adventure: Day Six, My Trip to Branson!

o-boy-o-boy-o-boy! A road trip!

Mom and Auntie N shopped, and I sniffed and greeted folks.

I love a trip in the car, especially when they're short trips.

This place was like none I've really seen before... lots of old folks, for sure, which is cool. Maybe next year we'll go to Disney Land!

You're probably asking... a trip to the Ozarks, with the colorful changing leaves... and the best you've got to show for is it is THIS photo? What can I say? Mom's the one with the opposable thumbs and forefinger!

We got back to the cabin in time to chow down on more good food and a good nap in front of the tv. Mom seems a little antsy tonight, but I'm not going to worry about it. If something's up, I'll be the first to know.

As I slumber, I'm thinking... if we're not going home, we need to fix this place up with a fenced yard and a little St Augustine.

Ozarks Adventure, Day Five, Mid-Morning: BIG CAT and the Turning Ponit

Mid-morning, Mom decided that she would like to drive into Branson this afternoon and tour the World's Largest Toy Museum.

At this point in the vacation, I had no cares, and a little time to myself would have really been no problem. But Auntie N wasn't feeling well... and as I rested peacefully on the sofa... they decided that Mom would go and Auntie N would C-sit. Whatever...! All's good.

Right about lunchtime, Mom took me on another short hike. I knew the program. This was about me doing what I needed to do. Unfortunately, I didn't much feel like doing those particular things.

We hiked to the cross-trail that leads to the marina and down to the lake. Once there, we turned around and started back to the cabin.

About 100 yards along the return trip, and about 50 feet in front of us... was the BIGGEST CAT I had ever seen. It was solid black, had short to medium length hair and a long straight tail. It walked slowly across the trail, where we had (just moments before) walked.

(Many peoples and other pals have asked me... ) What did I do? I did what any inteligent dog would do. I FROZE IN MY TRACKS. Mom and I quickly developed an alternate plan, and turned back around!

Now don't get me wrong, I have 14 feline cousins and two feline neighbors who like to sleep in my back yard. Had it been one of them... or one just like them, I would have chased it to my heart's content. Oh, and I've read the story about the golden defending his Mom against the mountain lion. I would have done that, too. For sure I would. But I figure, this big old cat was minding his own business, so... so should I!

That's what I figured!

Anyway, we took the trail back to the Marina road and followed it up the mountain. I won't lie, it was rough going. For some reason, we felt safer on a paved road. It was treacherously steep, but we finally made it up to the top of the mountain, where we took a winding road back down to the cabin. Auntie N was a little frantic when we got back, because we were gone so long.

I sighed deeply as I sank into the sofa for a nap, but Mom got on the internet to figure out exactly what we had seen. It turns out that there are many big cats in the Ozarks and what we saw was something called a BLACK PANTHER.

Mom called the cabin management people and according to her, they said, "yeah, so?". After that, all I heard her say was "Hiking is over. We have just been NYE-EVE." I don't know what that means, but I'm thinking if I had known about such big cats before, I probably would have just trotted around the cabin chasing BLACK SQUIRRELS.

Ozarks Adventure: Day Five... Morning Hike, Big Bird and Familiar Sounds

Bed time now is greeted with a heavy sigh by all involved.

I have resolved myself to the fact that there is an exchange for all things. For 24 hours spent with Mom's attention, I must trade a small portion of the real estate I have grown accustomed to having in the sleeping hours. I'm good with it. It is not too much to ask.

But there IS a lingering question... This IS vacation... right? At this point, I don't know. Is this a getaway? Or is this our new home...? As a golden, by my very nature, I hate to reveal any sort of anxiety... But I do wonder...

I know the routine now, and upon waking (and just enough smooching), I wait patiently for Mom to don her hiking clothes. I know the reward... a long, relaxed hike... at whatever pace I choose.

THIS morning, I choose a LONG walk. It is particularly tranquil in sound, but I find interesting scents... side-to-side of the trail. About a quarter of a mile down the trail... Mom stalled just a little. We both heard a low gutteral sort of sound... I looked back at Mom and she said it was probably a bird...

We were nearing the narrowing of the lake toward the big long bridge, and to our right, the sun began to really glisten off of what I could see of the lake between the trees... very far below our elevation.

We reached a little of a clearing... and Mom stopped suddenly, as I flushed a big old bird. He was perched on a guardrail, and was slow to take off but he seemed to just... sail. It was really cool, and Mom seemed in awe. I would later hear Mom tell Auntie N that we had seen "an eagle". I wasn't sure, but it sure wasn't a finch or a dove.

We continued a bit further and reached a steep bank at the highway. It was the first time that I have heard those familiar sounds since last Friday. All's good. We turned around and headed back for the cabin... home.

Ozarks Adventure: Day Four... An outing!

All's good in my world. The bed, though still small, is a pleasant place to land after a busy, busy day. :-)

This day was as those before it. Brisk morning and afternoon hikes. Sweet naps. Constant companionship (my personal favorite). And peaceful evenings.

The only variation today was... an outing! We went for a drive! We drove around the lake, and through the hills, and we just looked at things along the road. It's a lot different from H-town. If you're not going up, you're going down. There don't seem to be so many other peoples, either. I liked it, and my window was cracked just enough for me to put my nose through it.

On the way back to the cabin, we stopped at the foods store. Mom went in, leaving the windows down, and me and Auntie N stayed in the car. I was good. I was quiet. I was very calm.

Until...

This guy, who was parked a space over from us, returned to his car. Then, well, I did it. He never saw me. I laid in wait. And just when he least expected it, I barked (out of mere attention-seeking amusement... but he interpretted it as) ferociously. He might have boomed his pants, but then he turned to Auntie N in the front seat and began to lecture her about restraining me.

Auntie N got mad and told him a thing or two about a thing or two... me, I didn't get my fur ruffled. I was in a seat belt for God's sake. How much more could I be restrained? It wasn't even my protective bark... but my "hey, look at me!" bark!

Peoples have NO sense of humor.

It's ok. Life's good in the Ozarks. (That guy must have been from the big city).

Ozarks Adventure: Day Three... Trails, A Footloose Golden and Mom-Made Burgers

Mom laid down some laws about the bed. I didn't agree, but have felt too tired to really stake additional claims in the middle of the night. Ok, ok... I'll sleep north-south! I like, after all, that there is room for my Lolly!

I'm really getting the hang of this vacation thing:

1. The big chair that Mom moved to the window serves as guard post, squirrel blind, and most excellent napping spot.
2. The space on the sofa between Mom and Auntie N is just enough for me. Head placement should be on equal intervals of rotation, for maximum benefit.
3. Dr. Phil, Oprah and the judge shows are all on tv in the Ozarks. God is good. And so are remotes, opposable thumbs and forefingers.
4. Having my leash hanging by the door is cool. All I have to do is bump it with my nose... and voila! I'm out on the trail!
5. Trails are cool! Wildlife rocks! Sights and scents are enough for me to overlook the... (errrr) rocks.
6. I finally see the beauty of staying on the same side of the tree as Mom!
7. I met a footloose golden! He was really friendly, and it was exciting! I was a tiny bit jealous that he had no string, but later Mom told me that she was afraid she would get lost. I'm good with the string now. I would never want Mom to get lost.
8. Burgers! Can you believe it? Fried chicken, bacon and eggs... and burgers!!!! All in the same week!!!!

Life is GOOD in the Ozarks!

Ozarks Adventure: Day Two... Rocks, Mountains & Boom!

I tell you... that bed ain't getting any bigger. We managed, though, to negotiate "equal" allocations of space. My half was on the pillows. :-)

We woke up as the sun began to filter in the window, and I was anxious to greet the trails!

If you ever wonder where God put most of the rocks and hills in the world, I'm inclined to tell you... the Ozarks. I have roamed on and off the trails, to the high side and to the low side. And there is nothing but more rocks and hearty vegetation. I like it, none the less. There are rock outcroppings and tiny caves and everywhere, trees, trees, trees.

At the far end of our early morning hike, we reached a beautiful lake where there were many large birds. It was peaceful, really. And we rested a bit, just gazing, before we doubled back to go home. I think what's really neat is the sound of it all. It's like nothing I've ever heard.

About half the way back, what can I say... nature placed a call. I turned around to head back to the lake, but Mom didn't budge. So I did it. Right there to the downward side of the narrow trail, I boomed the biggest boom I have ever boomed in my life. I looked back at Mom, afraid that I had committed an infraction. And there she stood, with her arms upward, as if declaring a touchdown!

We jogged most of the way back to the cabin... well, until we came to the part you almost need a set of stairs to climb. It seems that we both laid our cares down at the same time!

Mom walked in and announced to Auntie N... "Don't be suprised if someone issues a bear alert!" She thought it was funny. I did not.

Ozarks Adventure: My First Full Day

I awoke early after a restful night's sleep with Mom on a teeny tiny bed. Mom says it is a queen, but it is definitely not fit for one. :-)

I could hardly wait to see what was outside the door. It was too dark to appreciate when we deboarded last night, after what seemed to me like a more than adequate nap in the car.

We quickly dressed, or I should say that Mom did. I have my own suitcase full of two coats, two sweaters, towels, toys, treats, food, leashes, stakes and cables... but I do not think I will need the apparel. It is colder in the air conditioned cabin than it is outside.

We headed out on our first trail about 7am. It was fun. There were so many scents; I just couldn't get enough. I swear (though Mom tells me not to), there was stuff out there I had never seen or even come close to smelling before.

There are squirrels here, too. Darn them all. They look different. Lots of em are black. Weird, huh?

We walked and walked and walked, and then we turned around and came back and headed down another trail. For a vacation, I couldn't figure out why Mom seemed a little impatient. She kept nagging me... "Don't ya need to boom?" I did. It's been a couple of days! But I wasn't sure it was appropriate. I mean, ya boom on level St Augustine, do you not? And I didn't find a speck.

We returned from our first hike, after about 45 minutes. I was hungry as an Ozark hog when we got back, so I ate a healthy breakfast and then rested my head in the window sill for a bit. Mid-morning, I greeted a second hike with equal enthusiasm! This is great!

After lunch, Mom left for what turned out to be a food gathering expedition. I stayed at the cabin with Auntie N, who I love... but I was none too happy about Mom leaving me. The sweetest site in these woods was her walking back in the door a short time later... WITH FOOD!
We went on more boomless hikes this afternoon. I had a nice nap. And I barked at some people who passed our cabin. Who knew there were peoples here???

Mom cooked fried chicken for dinner. She said it was bad for me and I couldn't have but just a little taste. What she didn't know is that Auntie N (did I mention that I love her?) fed me under the table. It sure was good!

We stayed close to the cabin after dinner. I don't think I've ever seen it so dark outside. The other girls worked on a jigsaw puzzle, while I dozed upside down on the sofa. Life is good in the Ozarks!

Ozarks Adventure: My Outlook, I saw Hope Come... and Go

The day on the road started out fun, with fresh donuts and Ozarka spring water, but in spite of the comfort of my Mom's shoulder, my (great) Auntie N's willingness to love on me, and the many and various locales I was priveleged to mark... it was a very LONG day.

I became dejected before reaching Harrison, Arkansas. I guess I was sighing a lot. Auntie N asked my Mom if I was ok. My mom said it best...

"She was excited about the trip, but she saw Hope (Arkansas)... come and go". She was right on the mark; I couldn't have said it better myself. Sometimes, I swear... that ole gal reads my mind!

We've arrived to a place I can't see. It's dark here now, and I'm not sure why exactly we came to this cabin. Mom seems really tired and a wee bit impatient. My plan is to follow wherever she goes, sleep close... and see what tomorrow brings!

Ozarks Adventure: My Outlook, Departure Day

It didn't take me long to figure out that we were really going on a trip. I had noticed the suit cases, including MY duffle, for several days.

In typical golden style, I remained calm. I know Mom will go nowhere without me. And we will go... when we go, and not a moment sooner. So, I protected the yard all morning, until I was given the official signal that we were to depart.

We left just after Mom ate a sandwich. I'm guessing it was around noon. All was good, for about an hour... and then I got the urge. Maybe it was the Ozarka, or maybe it was just that I wanted to see the surrounds of the outlet mall in Livingston. At any rate, Mom heard me... and she pulled over.

There were men there, on a ladder on a big truck. They seemed to be changing a sign. Mom thought that it was probably blown out by Rita.... it didn't matter to me. I barked! Don't get me wrong. I wasn't afraid. I just couldn't figure out why they were on top of the truck, instead of greeting me. My tone and wagging tail were a dead give-away!

I'm in Nacogdoches now. I've been here before. This is where my Mom and my brother, Wellington, were born. Or at least that's what I've been told. That was a long, long time ago, and I have no way of proving it.

My (second) cousins are not happy to see me. Perhaps they know that I'm going on an adventure with their mom; I'm not sure. Mom is keeping me separated from them, so I won't let on to the secret.

For now, I'm ready to get back on the road. Rest is out of the question. There is no need for sleep at this point. Let's go, let's go, let's go!!!

The Squirrels Need a Contraption

I've spent the weekend guarding the pecan tree. Mom has gathered pecans, from time to time, this weekend. She gathers some, and leaves others. I'm not sure I get the process.

As I lie in wait, the evil varmints throw the partially eaten produce and hulls down into the yard. Their plot, which I have successfully foiled, is to throw them down and then come down to feed and gather them up.

The scent of a freshly nibbled pecan is more than I can sometimes resist. Mom has scolded me several times as I've attempted to figure out what the big deal is. I think they taste nasty... and Mom says something about unripened or rotten. I don't know, the varmints are eating them like crazy.

On the other hand, Mom put some of the ones she gathered... into a contraption... Reed's Rocket!!! She let me try the much smaller and irregularly shaped pieces afterwards. Quite tasty!

The squirrels need one of these contraptions...!

goldens hurricane theorem no. 4

If it takes a hurricane to get Mom to spend 7 days at home, then I'm game.

goldens hurricane theorem no. 3

No matter how much you beg, the back side of a boarded up door is still blocked with plywood.

goldens hurricane theorem no. 2

(aptly named)

To an exaggerated extent, Mom will attempt to squeeze out the p and poo (the 1 and the 2...), before final boarding for an impending hurricane.

goldens hurricane theorem no. 1

There is no better sleep than within the confinds of a boarded up house.

goldens rule no. 7

When Mom brushes you, roll over on your back. Your belly hair is the only thing she's interested in brushing. If she complains, look at her with your pitiful, but loving eyes.

goldens postulate no. 1

There is a direct and proportional relationship between the severity of pouting and the length of time Mom is gone from home.

goldens rule no. 6

Relish the luxury of having a full-time personal valet, maid, butler, doorman and concierge, especially on long weekends and Mom's vacation days.

Rado, My Friend, My Sweetheart

Rado

My Friend

My Sweetheart

Rado trotted through the Gates of Heaven last night.

If I know my Rado, he is working the crowd tonight.

He is missing his Daddy, Judy, Grandma and Grandpa

but the half of Heaven

that have had the honor of meeting him,

playing with him and petting him,

are already under his spell.

Rado is sweet and gentle.

And easy going.

He is handsome and happy.

And Rado has a good sense of humor.

Rado is making the most of his new Adventure.

I am sad today.

I spent Thanksgiving 2004 with Rado.

It was love at first sight.

We spent four blissful days together.

He humored my every whim.

We made a sandwich out of Mom.

He liked all the dogs I like.

And he barked ferociously at all the dogs I don't.

He shared his treats and I shared mine.

We ate turkey together on Thanksgiving Day.

He even let Mom photograph him in those moose ears.

I especially loved the way he woofed to remind Mom of dinnertime.

I will miss Rado.

I had hopes that we would spend much more time together.

I know his family did, too.

goldens rule no. 5

Should the cable go out when you're all alone, notify the authorities (you know... Mom, with the opposable thumbs) immediately upon arrival. Static is NOT good, nor is missing Oprah!